Our families have lost two venerable members, both of whom were well into their tenth decade of life. Both Dr. Jacob       Melnick, and Dr. Nahum Helman, were men of great personal accomplishment, who had endeared themselves well beyond the ambit of their immediate loved ones. Despite their formidable longevity, there is no good time for anyone to take their leave of us. In fact, it is because of their long presence among us, that we all have derived a certain important comfort in our lives. The human mind is a funny thing. Rationally, all of us understand that we are mortal. However, the truly aged among us let us play a trick on ourselves: they enable us to delude ourselves into suspending belief about our mortality. When we see their enduring presence among us, we hope against hope that they will always be there, and consequently that we too, will always be there. When such individuals finally do leave us, that illusion is shattered, and it forces us to face an uncomfortable reality once again.

I recall, with some wistfulness, the instance of my grandfather, who well into his eighties, would officiate as a Cantor for the High Holy Days. Year after year, we would return to the same establishment. On the eve of Rosh Hashanah, when we would first enter the sanctuary for prayer, he would be greeted with extraordinary enthusiasm by the elderly worshipers, most of whom were his juniors. They were delighted, that a year later, their 'alter baal-tefilah' had returned yet again. It was not until many years later, that I came to understand this as their way of celebrating the fact that it was possible to cheat the Angel of Death ñ at least for a while.

Like other family patriarchs before them, these  men have left behind a proud legacy, along with families well rooted in our noble tradition. But the space that they occupied in our lives cannot  be filled for those who knew them, lived with them, and whose lives were in some measure  shaped by them. And once again we see that what is mortal is not constant.

Maya, on 25Sep00 to Yohanan & Ayelet Benvenisti, granddaughter of Odded & Jocheved Ritz, great-granddaughter of Manya Ritz.

Elisheva, on 08Oct00, 5lb 12oz, 19½ Daughter to Joanna & Farrell Goldsmith, granddaughter of Fran & Allan Rosenblatt, great-granddaughter to Sylvia Krugman.
 
 
 

Sophie Hannah, 0n 02Nov00, 7lbs 13oz, 20 ½". Called Sima Chana in Hebrew, daughter of Ellen Zucrow & Bobby Harris, granddaughter of Morley & Corrine Harris.
 
 

Dr. Jacob Melnick, retired physician, in New Jersey on 12Nov00 at age 93. Our beloved 'Uncle George,' husband of our dear cousin Beatrice Melnick, father of Arthur, Larry & Judy Brickman, grandfather of Rebecca & Emily Melnick, & Daniel Scott Brickman.

Dr. Nahum Helman, retired dentist, in Jerusalem on 14Nov00 at age 94. A venerable scion of the Helman/Gelman Family of Zelva, father of Rabbi Boruch Koppel Helman & Toby Gershfield, grandfather of four and great-grandfather of six. He was Uncle Nathan to the Israeli Freidin family, as a brother of the late matriarch, Malka Gelman Freidin, wife of Itchkeh Freidin.

Al Waxman passed away on 18Jan01 at the age of 65, husband of Sara, a daughter of Mendel & Hannah Shapiro, and father of Tobaron (daughter) and Adam (son). He had undergone cardiac surgery which apparently was unable to correct a heart that was too weakened.  His father had also died of heart disease at age 45, and his brother  was also deceased.  He was a very beloved figure in Canada, having received  the highest award from the Canadian government (Order of Canada) for his  contributions as an actor and as a philanthropist. He also received the  Canadian television's Gemini lifetime achievement award. His son, Adam, spoke at his father's  funeral as did other prominent Canadians.  A thousand people were at the funeral.

Inside Feature

Belle Millo writes that her son Ari was stationed in Gaza for some time with his crack Golani Brigade. He was recently promoted to sergeant  and is a sniper.

I could not help recollect the remark that Golda Meir made to Anwar el-Sadat during his historic visit to Jerusalem. Apart from asking him, "what took you so long?' she offered him the following observation:

"We can forgive you for killing our children, but we cannot forgive you for compelling us to teach our children to kill yours."

An unfortunate reality of the world we live in, is the requirement to demonstrate a willingness to unleash lethal force, in order to deter the foresworn enemy. While this is not always seen to be consonant with the teachings of our faith, it is well to remember the admonition of yet another Israeli Prime Minister, David Ben-Gurion: it is not the dead who praise the Lord. 

There are instances where, through longevity and commanding presence, an individual is transformed into an institution in the lives of those who live around him. Dr. Jacob Melnick was such an individual. The statistics are arresting to say the least:
 

ï He practiced medicine in his native Brooklyn for over 62 years. That is longer than my lifetime, and I am already  a grandfather of four.

ï In his time, he dispensed care to six generations in our family alone.

ï He could regale us for hours on end with what it meant to practice medicine without sulfa drugs and antibiotics, as we sat around wide-eyed ñ because that's how long ago he personally got started as a doctor. It was one thing to read about how 'they died like flies' during the Great Influenza Epidemic of 1919. It was quite another thing to have him tell us how he watched it happen.

With all this, his enduring legacy, that remains forever in our hearts, comes from the gentle, humored, and avuncular person he was, and in the way he graced our lives with his easy manner, and the understated confidence he had, in the mastery of his art as a healer. No 'Last Angry Man' was this physician. But his professional life contains some interesting elements of our family history.

As a young doctor, fresh out of Columbia Medical School, he partnered with a colleague who also served as a Vereindoktor, dispensing services to a typical Jewish immigrant fraternal society as part of the social services that those organizations were formed to offer their members. Needing to be away, the partner asked his young colleague to take over his caseload. The Verein was the Zelver Benevolent Association. Thus Dr. Jacob Melnick took his first step to becoming 'Uncle George,' when he visited the home of my great-uncle Isidore Freed, first to attend my great-grandmother, Bubbeh Genendel, and where he would meet his future wife, Beatrice.

His practice in Brooklyn became an institution in its own right. It was always an experience to run into a patient of his, only to be greeted with wonder and effusiveness when it emerged that 'I was a cousin of Dr. Melnick.' His practice took a very interesting turn in the mid-fifties, when he was personally suffering from some back pain. He chanced to hear of an innovative treatment being pursued by Dr. Janet Travell in Manhattan. After visiting her and receiving much relief, he decided to build on her techniques, and focus his own practice on pain management. Dr. Travell would go on to achieve national prominence in connection with easing the back problems of President John F. Kennedy. Meanwhile, Uncle George zeroed in on treating a variety of ailments in which 'trigger areas' were responsible for the onset of pain, and he devised many approaches to alleviating such pain.

All the while, there he was, going through one generation after another in the whole Freed family. Before he got to me, he had already gone through my grandmother and mother: I was the fourth generation. He would yet tend my children, and finally my first grandchild, Daryn Alexandra Javer, even if nominally.

And he was always there, most satisfyingly, when one would come to visit in the Melnick home. It was an interesting experience to grow up, and attain enough maturity and education to be able to interact with Uncle George on his level. For me personally, it was most rewarding, when I could see my son, Dr. Daniel Berger, standing next to his Uncle George, both with stethoscopes around their necks, 'talking shop.'

But even Dan will tell you, that what he remembers most, is that when he was a little boy, running around the Melnick house with his siblings and cousins, it was the comforting presence of Uncle George sitting in his armchair, puffing a cigar, and listening to his 'Victrola,' that meant so much.

Yes. When Arthur, Larry and Judy came, I became their 'big cousin.' In time, when I had children, the Melnick kids became the 'big cousins' to them. And when Daniel Brickman was born, lo and behold, my kids became his 'big cousins.' Through all of this, there always was Uncle George.

How easy to believe there would always be Uncle George! Nobody knew, and therefore could not conceive, of a world without him. And yet, as our High Holy Day prayers tell us, we are ñ indeed ñ likened unto a fragile potsherd, and that inevitably like a cloud, we will pass over, and vanish as if we were only a dream...

The ravages of time eventually took their toll. But as he was fond of telling us, 90% of longevity is in the genes, and he did reach a seniority comparable to that of his parents. Ironically and sadly, his sister Gertie, a scant few years his junior, passed away only a week before him.

His life stands as a monument in many respects. He was accomplished in his chosen field, and was greatly loved and respected by all those who knew him. He leaves a profound void in the life of not only his beloved wife, children and grandchildren, but also in the lives of those kin, who benefitted so much from the warmth and caring oversight that he gave them, throughout his remarkable sojourn with us.

On November 14, 2000, Dr. Nathan (Nahum) Helman, a brother of the late Malka Freidin of Tel Aviv, passed away in Jerusalem at the age of 94. Dr. Helman was born in Zelva in 1906, in the Grodno Province of White Russia, then a part of Czarist Russia. He was born into a family of seven children; three sisters and four brothers. They lived in a large old stone house which they shared with cousins who used the name, Gelman. Their ancestors had come to Zelva from the nearby town of Zhetl (today known as Dyatlovo) about 150 years before, and bought the house and the surrounding farm of several acres. The area in front of the house was large enough to contain many wagons and horses on market days and court assize days. The fruit orchard at the rear, and the vegetable garden, were used by the local Zionists to train young people to become agricultural pioneers in the Holy Land.

The Helman quarters on the ground floor had a large room where Jewish visitors to the town came for a kosher meal, served by the whole family.  This room had a large free-standing brick oven (a kaymen) which was used by many of the local Jewish families to cook their cholent from Friday afternoon until Shabbat after the morning prayers. Dr. Helman's mother Miriam (called Michlah in Yiddish), placed and removed the heavy cholent pots herself. She passed away during the Great Influenza Epidemic of 1919. The family, nevertheless, continued the tradition of cooking for visitors to Zelva.

As a teenager, Nathan Helman made speeches in Zelva and the surrounding villages about the need to make aliyah to the Holy Land. His brother Frank, spent some time on a kibbutz, but then returned to Zelva. When Canada allowed some immigration from Europe in the 1920's, the Helman family moved there, with the exception of the oldest daughter who was ten years senior to the next sibling, and who was married to Itchkeh Freidin. They already had several children, and were considered to be a separate family unit by that time. Rather than wait for the Canadian quota to accept them, the Freidins made aliyah and settled in Tel Aviv.

The Helmans were settled on a farm in Western Canada, but within a year, moved to Winnipeg, Manitoba to be near other Jewish families. Nathan attended public school to learn English. His father approached Rabbi Kahanovich, the Chief Rabbi of Western Canada, who occupied that position until his death in 1945. He suggested that his son, Nathan, marry the Rabbi's daughter Sophie, since the families were related through a great-grandparent. Sophie was a grade school teacher and also an active speaker on behalf of the Zionist movement, and it looked like a good match. Nathan was studying Shakespeare in high school at that time, and they met in the public library and quoted Shakespeare to each other.

Sophie encouraged Nathan to become a dentist. There had been no dentists in Zelva, and he was not sure what it entailed, but he thought that her advice must be good. They married, and went to Toronto, where Nathan obtained his D.D.S. from the University of Toronto in 1937. They lived on a small stipend from Rabbi Kahanovich and on fees that Nathan earned from preparing boys for their bar mitzvah.

After graduation, Nathan and his family moved to the small town of Rainy River, Ontario, with a population of 1,000. He took over a retiring dentist's house and office for the monthly rent of $C25. When World War II broke out, Nathan felt that he wanted to express his gratitude to his adopted country by serving in the Canadian Army. He was too old to be conscripted, but they accepted his application, and when he volunteered to go overseas, he was sent to England. The day after D-Day, he was shipped to France to work on soldiers whose teeth and jaws with the had been damaged in the fighting. He went army into Belgium and Holland as well. When the war ended, and troops were being sent home, Nathan traveled to Tel Aviv to see his sister and her family whom he had not seen in about twenty years.

After discharge from the Canadian Army in 1946, Nathan and his wife discussed the possibility of moving to the Land of Israel, but they lacked the financial means to make this possible.  Neither was he able to start his own practice, and he felt that the quickest way to make a living for his wife and two children would be to work in a clinic in Winnipeg. Moving to Israel was always foremost in their minds, and they finally did move to Jerusalem in 1973, a couple of years after he retired at the age of 65.  He had wanted to continue practicing dentistry in Israel, and had corresponded with dentists, but was told he was too old to be hired by another dentist. Buying a practice was out of the question, because he did not have that kind of money. So, he volunteered as a dentist, and spent more than twenty years volunteering in dental clinics. His wife, Sophie, who had been in poor heath, passed away in 1974, one year after the Yom Kippur War.

Dr. Nathan Helman had always lived as though he was still in Zelva ñ he walked to work in Winnipeg and he walked to work in Jerusalem ñ six miles in each direction. He lived frugally and ate simple foods. He believed that a Spartan life was good for people and made them strong. He always talked about the hard, coarse bread that his mother had baked in Zelva, and felt that no other bread was as good. As a trained dentist, he always advocated eating hard foods to give the bones and muscles of the jaw good exercise ñ hard bread and hard raw fruits and vegetables.

After undergoing surgery for colon cancer, Dr. Helman realized that he could no longer independently take care of his needs, and he moved to a nursing home. While there, he discussed his concepts of nutrition with the cooks who, as a result, lightened up his personal diet, and altered their cooking style for the people in the nursing home. The cooks told Dr. Helman's son, Rabbi Boruch Koppel Helman, that they all felt better as a result of the changes made based on his dietary advice..

At the age of 94, the end came swiftly, and he was buried in Jerusalem. Family, dentists from the clinic, and residents of the nursing home, all attended the funeral. Dr. Helman was eulogized for his wide-ranging interests in the Jewish faith,  its philosophy, and in scientific subjects. He remains an inspiration to his son, Rabbi Boruch Koppel Helman, his daughter Toby Gershfield, wife of Rabbi Eddie Gershfield, grandchildren, and great-grandchildren, and nephews and nieces in Canada, the United States and Israel.

As I previously reported, the production and distribution of the Dereczin Memorial Book has been a really fine success, due in large measure to your strong support. This volume can now be found in more than fifty libraries worldwide, in addition to the many copies that you have obtained for your own personal use. We continue to have a comfortable, but not excessive, inventory to meet future demand. Such a future demand seems to have a way of materializing. I have continued to be gratified by individuals or small groups that appear, seemingly out of nowhere, with a need to probe their past and their antecedents. Thanks to you ñ we are ready!

My work on the next target of opportunity is moving apace. I have, this month, completed translating the first of two volumes of the Volkovysk Yizkor Book written in Yiddish and edited by Dr. Moses Einhorn, published in New York, 1948-9. In addition to Volume II, there are two other works, in Hebrew, that round out what is a 'Volkovysk Trilogy.' The existence of multiple books is somewhat of a rarity, although not unknown. These additional books are also part of this particular effort.

I can assure you that this work is just as interesting and relevant to us, as scions of Zelva and Dereczin. Volkovysk was a 'magnet city' for the surrounding smaller shtetl Jewish populace. Thus, its fine Hebrew school system became a sought-after facility by Jewish families within its ambit. My own late cousin, Chaim Jonah Gilony, attended the Volkovysk Gymnasium, and one of his classmates was Yitzhak Yazhernitsky from Ruzhany, today known as Yitzhak Shamir, a former Prime Minister of Israel.

My work on Volume I has opened up a very absorbing look into the life and times of 19th and even 18th century Jewish life in Eastern Europe, and its context. Volume II will be more demanding emotionally, since this is where the destruction of the Jewish community is documented. I have already confirmed that Volume II records the concentration of the Zelva Jews in Volkovysk, prior to being shipped to their tragic death in Treblinka. My initial cursory look did not uncover specific Zelva family names in this connection, but there may be such detail that did not catch my eye.

That does not mean the work does not effervesce with familiar family names: Bereshkovsky, Lev, Ogulnick, and Lantzevitsky are not hard to find, among others. Again, this city is part of a larger Jewish fabric that was in place for no less than four, and perhaps as much as six centuries.  That families married into one another should be accepted as axiomatic, even without the formal physical evidence to prove it. And consequently, in recognizing that we are landsleit, we also admit to being related to one another, no matter how distantly.

In an attempt to find a means of bringing a far-flung family together for some time together, the entire Berger clan went off on a Disney Magic cruise during February, joined by uncle Joshua and aunt Harriet Freed. We managed to prove that traveling with four small babies  is never easy, despite the comprehensive support services of a Disney facility. Even though there was an endemic stomach virus that waylaid passengers and crew alike, we did enjoy the amenities of this remarkable floating hotel. We did get to see the famous synagogue on St. Thomas in the Virgin Islands, and I have a T-Shirt and coffee cup to prove it!
 
 
 

  Wishing You One and All
A Happy & Healthy Passover Season!

 

The  Freidins of Zelva  Family Newsletter Editor-Publisher............................. Jack S. Berger  Web Host............................................. Randi Ostro  Publisher Emeritus.................... Samuel K. Rubin The Family Newsletter of the Freidins of Zelva is published periodically to foster communications between the descendants of TANHUM YITZHAK FREIDIN ritual slaughterer of the town of Zelva in the Grodno Province of Belarus. For further information, the Editor-Publisher may be reached as follows: Jack S. Berger 12 Janice Court Mahwah, NJ 07430-1515  USA Telephone: 201-529-3391 E-mail: JSBerger@Sigmaxi.org  ©  Copyright  2001  All rights reserved